Tuesday, February 19, 2013

Alex Jones thinks wrestling is real and 9/11 is fake

I hesitate to give any sort of attention to a feces-flinger like Alex Jones, noted 9/11 Truther and libertarian loudmouth. At best, he's a deeply disturbed individual in need of serious psychiatric help, at worst, he's a charlatan playing a character in order to con rednecks out of their money... kinda like a wrestling promoter!

If you haven't heard of Jones, surely you saw his rant on Piers Morgan last month where he said Americans need to be heavily armed for the coming war with the United States military, which I imagine would go down a lot like last night's match between Mark Henry and Sin Cara.

Now, don't get me wrong, screaming at Piers Morgan is good, clean fun for the whole family, but I think we can all agree Jones is an asshole. Anyhoo, he's not thrilled with WWE's new Tea Party character, Zeb Colter, he had this to say today.

This is part of the divide and conquer tactic of cultural subversion to manufacture racial division and to characterize the Tea Party, conservatives, libertarians, opponents of uncontrolled illegal immigration and constitutionalists as racist, extremist radicals who should be pushed to the fringes of the political discourse.

Now the demonization runs so deep that it’s even being bolstered by WWE wrestling.

The fact that WWE is owned by Vince and Linda McMahon, who are part of the Republican establishment, also tells us a lot about how grass roots conservatives and libertarians are viewed by those near the top of the power structure.

Why are we getting so wound up about a wrestling gimmick? WWE programming reaches 14 million Americans every week – and millions more worldwide. To put it in context – that’s more than 10 times the amount of viewers who watch America’s top rated news show, The O’Reilly Factor

10 times the amount of viewers that watch Bill O'Reilly? Maybe there's hope for America yet.

And a huge "LOL!" to Vince and Linda McMahon being "near the top of the Republican power structure." Yes, the Linda McMahon who spent $100 million to lose two bids for the US Senate and the Vince McMahon who was indicted by the federal government. They're just a heartbeat away from global domination!

Now, I don't agree with Vince & Linda's politics at all, but they are what the Republican Party has traditionally stood for: give me your money. The problem with this isn't that they're a couple "establishment types" making fun of the Tea Party in a fake wrestling story... the problem is, in the real world, the Tea Party has pushed the establishment to the fringe. You can't be a part of the Republican Party anymore if you don't subscribe to their extreme brand of politics: anti-immigrant, anti-woman, anti-gay, anti-government, anti-science, anti-shower, etc. In today's America, Vince & Linda are more toxic than they usually are, they're not just smut-peddlers, they're smut-peddlers who also dress nice and speak in complete sentences.

If you ever want to piss off a racist, hold a mirror up to their racism, which WWE is doing here. WWE has a huge Latino fanbase... also a huge European fanbase, Australian fanbase, Asian fanbase, Arabic fanbase, etc. etc. etc. and their history of racist storylines and characters has always struck me odd considering this fact. But that's changing; today, their World Heavyweight Champion is a proud Mexican who doesn't hide his heritage, but it's also not his only defining characteristic. Alberto Del Rio is a great wrestler who also happens to be Mexican, he's also a great friend, very stylish and a bit of a joker. That's a very welcome change from having a Mexican wrestler drive to the ring on a lawnmower.

So in this progress (which, admittedly, is entirely financially-driven), WWE is capitalizing on the current immigration fight by presenting a strong Mexican role model against a batshit crazy white racist. This is new(ish) territory for wrestling, usually the shoe is on the foot with the strong white hero conquering the evil foreigner, and much like the shifting dynamics of real-world America, racists are becoming increasingly uncomfortable with this change, which makes them increasingly louder.

Alex Jones and the paranoid doomsday preppers that he panders to are dying off. And in a last ditch effort to preserve their idyllic 1950s America, are willing to wear their hate right on their sleeves in an almost cartoonish fashion. What better place to see it play out than in the cartoon world of professional wrestling?


  1. Why would two men fight over a belt when neither of them is wearing pants?

    It doesn't make sense!

    -- MrJM

  2. Allow me to rebut with this counterquestion: why would two masked men fight mask vs. mask when they both wear masks?

  3. Well obviously cause the other guy's mask is cooler.

  4. Alex Jones has never said WWE is real, in fact-he said the opposite. Where did you get that info from?