Friday, April 1, 2011

Randy Orton: Superstar of the Century

Devastating stomps, neck-wrenching headlocks and more stomps, Randy Orton is one of the most feared Superstars to ever step foot in a wrestling ring. But beyond the fear he strikes into the hearts of his opponent (through his devastating stomps), Mr. Orton is a kind-hearted philanthropist whose work through his dental charity has improved the lives of so many who thought they'd never smile again.

In WWE, Randy Orton shattered all expectations when he not only became a better wrestler than his father, he's also out-performed anyone that shared the stage with Bob Orton in the main event of the first WrestleMania. Hulk Hogan and Roddy Piper have since gone on record to say that while they helped put WrestleMania on the map, it never would've became a worldwide phenomenon without the birth of Randall Keith Orton.

When it comes time to end one of his matches, Orton will finish off his opponents with his RKO (a move that he invented), the career-ending Punt, or more stomps. Whichever of his 1,006 holds that he decides to finish his opponent off with, it can be guaranteed that his arm will be raised in victory. This Sunday, at WrestleMania 27, he looks to go 742-0 and continue his nine-year undefeated streak against CM Punk.

If you see Randy Orton today, make sure to wish him a very happy birthday and congratulate him on being named the Superstar of the Century.


  1. My favorite part of Orton's oeuvre is his promo work. When he heroically promised to cripple CM Punk, forcing him into a permanent state of 24-hour nursing care, I was touched. Here is a man who has not just the courage to stand up to bully heels, but also the patriotism to respect America and its greatest health care system in the world.

    I salute the Apex Predator.

  2. You're not being sarcastic, right? (Considering your distaste for the man's in-ring persona).

  3. And a happy April Fools Day to you, Razor.