Monday, September 7, 2009

Raw Thoughts - September 7, 2009


Okay, that opening segment was comedy gold. Santino, Jillian, IRS & grumpy Chris Jericho (complete with name tag taped to his bare chest... seriously) are the first contestants on The Price is Raw?! Might as well just end the review here, because nothing's going to be cooler than typing that sentence. Bob Barker, the television icon that he is, played this one to the hilt and you could tell he was having a blast, the best part was him and Jericho trying not to laugh during their little face off, with IRS being a close second. Jericho was such a jerk here, the kind of jerk that would bid $1 more than the guy next to him! Also, the crowd going INSANE for Barker just put this one over the top as one of my favorite goofy Raw moments in history.

Since Jericho won the first item up for bid - the Smackdown 10th Anniversary DVD - by accidentally bidding $1, he gets to move on to compete for a bigger prize... a trip to Hawaii! But first, he's got to get through MVP! Another good match between these two, not sure if it was as good as their bout last week, but still really enjoyable and the crowd was still red hot from the opening segment, so it made everything better. Huge pop for MVP's win, I can't help but continue to hope that WWE notices and gets him back on track once he moves on from this feud with JeriShow. If MVP's not at least getting a peek at the WWE Title by the end of 2009, it'll be a huge waste.

DX spinning the virtual wheel was a nice touch, I figured it would be a bit costly and time consuming for WWE's set designers to duplicate that. Bob Barker saying "I've got two words for ya: spin it" was also hilarious. DX vs. Chris Master & Randy Orton is an odd main event though, we'll see how that goes.

Hey look, Chavo Guerrero doesn't have to wrestle Hornswoggle this week! In his first real match in months, Chavo takes on Evan Bourne, and for the most part, it was a solid bout. Evan took a nasty spill after missing that top rope hurricanrana, and just when it looked like Chavo was going to capitalize (and win a... NEW CAR!) Hornswoggle interferes, shooting Chavo with a squirt gun! All in front of the ref too, how is this not a blatant disqualification?! Evan gets a quick roll-up for a win in an absolutely bizarre finish.

Oh great, so after Raw goes off the air last week with the crowd begging for Cody Rhodes to kick Randy Orton's ass, they send him out tonight to completely erase it. As I mentioned in last week's Kick-Out!! Radio, there was plenty of time for WWE to screw this up, and I'm honestly not surprised they did it this quickly. Great, now I have the horrible stigma of being the guy who found Cody Rhodes interesting for a week, thanks for making me look like a dork, WWE! I was doing a fine job all by myself!

Cody Rhodes vs. John Cena was angering beyond belief. The match itself was fine, but just ONE SEGMENT BEFOREHAND, Evan Bourne won a match after blatant outside interference on his behalf, but Cody Rhodes gets DQed for Randy Orton running into the ring and getting tripped by John Cena!? Are you freaking kidding me?! I get it, sometimes you need a DQ finish, but don't put it right after a match that didn't end in a DQ, even though it had MORE interference! I can forgive a little inconsistency, but this was just flat-out insulting to my intelligence.

Batista next Monday with a major announcement, eh? Interesting.

We're back to the Price is Raw and our next contestant is... AJ Pierzynski? Really, that assclown? Chicago rightfully boos the hell out of him, and he responds with major class by flipping them off. What a tool. Anyway, Santino Marella wins the next item up for bid, a WrestleMania 26 travel package! Wait... what if he has to work? Oh well, Santino moves onto the next round where he could win a hot tub (Bella Twins not included, but look, WWE found something for them to do!), and all he has to do is bodyslam... The Big Show! Big Show makes quick work of Santino (shocking), but Bob Barker is giving Show a shot at the tub if he can bodyslam... Mark Henry!

Mark Henry vs. Big Show
was more enjoyable than their encounter last week, mainly thanks to the fun bodyslam challenge gimmick. I honestly don't remember one of those since Yokozuna on the USS Intrepid in 93, which gave us Lex Luger's face turn. Before that, I think you have to go back to WrestleMania 1 with Andre the Giant vs. Big John Studd! I'm a sucker for old school stuff like that and it was impressive to see Mark bodyslam Show, which got me more excited for the tag match on Sunday. Only question is... who's willing to get in that hot tub with the World's Strongest Man?

The Diva of the Decade, Trish Stratus, will be hosting next week's Raw! Awesome.

Bob Barker beats up Chavo Guerrero backstage and then reminds us to help control the pet population? I'm officially watching the greatest Raw ever.

DX vs. Randy Orton & Chris Masters was an okay main event, obviously Masters was just there to take the pinfall, but oddly enough, the show went on for quite a bit after the match. Legacy (yawn) interfered to save Orton, with DX chasing them out of the building, where I'm pretty sure they carjacked a guy to get away. Even while committing felonies, I still can't bring myself to care about Cody & Ted. Orton slithers (because he's a viper, get it?) back to the ring and runs his mouth about John Cena, who rushes the ring, only to get hit with the middle rope DDT and the RKO on a steel chair. I was actually hoping for Batista to make the save, since WWE's been known to pull the old "advertise him for next week, bring him out tonight" stunt, but sadly it was not to be. I'd like to think Orton will FINALLY lose at Breaking Point, but I sense serious shenanigans that will force John Cena to begrudgingly say "I Quit," with the feud FINALLY reaching its proper conclusion at Hell in a Cell.

Despite my gripes with Orton and Legacy, I highly enjoyed tonight's Raw. There weren't any in-ring masterpieces (sorry Chris Masters), but thanks to a raucous crowd and an absolutely stellar performance from Bob Barker, it turned out to be a really fun show. Seriously, there's really nothing anyone can say about Barker that will do the man justice, but the guy is an icon in every sense of the word and I hope that if I'm lucky to even make to 85 years old, I can be as youthful and vibrant as him. And please remember, help control the pet population, have your pet spayed or neutered!


  1. Regarding the Body Slam Challenge: Through out their feud with Andre The Giant, Big John Studd with manager Bobby The Brain Heenan put up 10 to 15 thousand dollars for anyone to slam him. Obviously, the man who did it was Andrew, but on a technical stand point, for a long string of matches, every match Studd was in was a body slam challenge

  2. Big Show/Henry more entertaining than last week? Eh, I felt like I was watching paint dry or snails move when the two went at it tonight. The Body Slam Challenge didn't do it for me.

    I agree though with Bob Barker being tremendous tonight. Some of the best comedy bits I've seen in a long while in WWE. Jericho/Barker will be featured years from now.

  3. Like I said, I'm a sucker for that kind of old school stuff. I'm never going to care about a straight up one-on-one match between Henry and Show, because I know what it'll be like, but the body slam challenge gave it a different dynamic and a reason for me to care.

  4. bob barker threatening to put jericho over his knee if he doesn't get to the ring and be a good boy = amazing

  5. That opening was a bit long, but I think I can justify it when I.R.S.'s bid for the Smackdown DVD was "$50 including taxes."

    Actually, a pretty decent show. I watched this while chatting with TLHobo and the show is probably infinitely better when we're loudly talking to each other during the matches and the show.

  6. AJ Pierzininininski or whatever wasn't flipping the crowd off, he was showing his World Series winners ring, or whatever winners ring he was wearing. That's what King said anyway. It did look like he had his two fingers up instead of the one though.

  7. To me, it looked like he was pointing to his middle finger. Even if there was a ring on it, the guy's just a dick.

  8. I like his intensely bleached WHITE HAIR.

  9. I'd like to intensely bleach his face with my fist!

  10. So bob barker is the us bruce forsyth apart from the random beating of Charvo I think next week they should bring back the annoying girl from the DX segment to beat him up.

    But it was a great Raw for the second week on a row which is nice it's just a shame they wasted the whole Cody angle I mean what's the point of doing it in the first place if your just going to talk as if it was nothing the guy atacked his 'great dad' have so respect for it and have him hesitate to help and consider attacking him for a few weeks

    all in all though still a enjoyable show which is always good plus trish next week and all of the Ex-wrestlers have great shows