Thursday, June 4, 2009

Kick-Out's Extreme Rules Predictions

The card's a bit heavy on rematches, but that's somewhat the point of Extreme Rules - feuds that are so intense, they need to be settled in gimmick matches. Doesn't make a lot of sense to just stick two guys in a cage if they have no prior issues with each other; what do you think this is, TNA? BUH-ZING! (sorry)

Miss WrestleMania Crown - Hog Pen Match
Vickie Guerrero vs. Santina Marella
Okay, so does anyone really want to read my in-depth predictions about this one? Santina wins so the fans get to laugh at Vickie rolling around in pig slop... that's assuming they're not busy booing the match out of the building. Not even a Hillbilly Jim cameo could save this one, expect a complete train wreck.

Samoan Strap Match
CM Punk vs. Umaga
This one has potential to get pretty rough, I'm expecting at least one of these guys will be leaving the match with some nasty welts. Hopefully this will be a bit more of a quicker pace than their encounter last month and if so, it has potential to be the sleeper hit of the show. I'll say CM Punk breaks his two month PPV losing streak, wins this one and moves onto another feud. Bonus prediction: even if he wins, smarks will still find some reasoning as to why Punk is being "buried."

United States Championship - Fatal Four Way
Kofi Kingston © vs. MVP vs. William Regal vs. Matt Hardy
Glad WWE added this match, I'd hate to see any of these guys left off a PPV, especially when they're the only thing keeping Raw's upper-midcard alive (aside from The Miz, who has been left off the PPV... how dare they?). Anyway, it's a bit of a hastily thrown together match, but it has potential to be a very good match. Kofi Kingston just got the title, so I say he retains here to solidify his shock win Monday night.

Intercontinental Championship - No Holds Barred
Rey Mysterio © vs. Chris Jericho
Quick question, what makes No Holds Barred different from the Hardcore Rules match that will also be on the show? Anyway, this is one of the toughest matches on the card to predict because I can really see it going either way. Mysterio can win and Jericho can throw a fit, or Jericho could win, get the IC Title, but still have unfinished business with Rey Rey. I'll go out on a limb and say that Chris Jericho will win, become the first ever nine-time Intercontinental Champ, but fail to unmask Mysterio, which will continue the feud.

Submission Match
John Cena vs. Big Show
I like both of these guys, but their feud just hasn't done it for me. I don't think they'll be able to top the searchlight spot from Backlash, so any match they have at this point won't have the impact of the catalyst that began the feud in the first place. I do see the feud coming to an end here though, John Cena will win, either by debuting a new submission finisher, or using a weapon to lock in the STF like he did last year against JBL, or at the 2007 Royal Rumble when he choked out Umaga.

ECW Championship - Hardcore Triple Threat
Christian © vs. Tommy Dreamer vs. Jack Swagger
I have high hopes for this one, especially considering it could be Tommy Dreamer's last match. I'm hoping for some fun WWE-style hardcore wrestling, which we haven't seen much of in the last few years - garbage cans, road signs, tables, kendo sticks, etc. Any of these three guys would make sense to win it, but I'm going to stick with Captain Charisma and say Christian retains, Dreamer retires and Swagger quits ECW and moves up to Raw or Smackdown. That last one is a bit of a longshot, but ECW is overflowing with heels and since Swager's already won the belt, there's no need for him to stay in the Land of Extreme.

WWE Championship - Steel Cage Match
Randy Orton © vs. Batista
Hopefully this is the end of this feud and we can finally start shuffling things around on Raw a bit. I can't see them taking the belt off Orton yet and even if they did, there would be pretty much no one for Batista to feud with since Raw is starved for top heels. I don't think anyone's going to get excited about the prospect of spending $40 on a PPV featuring Batista vs. Big Show. Randy Orton retains, but Raw's future is still very cloudy.

World Heavyweight Championship - Ladder Match
Edge © vs. Jeff Hardy
This is a tough one, possibly the hardest to predict, although it is my definite prediction for Match of the Night. There are the rumors that Hardy's taking time off, but there were rumors Cena was taking time off after Backlash and that didn't happen. I try not to let internet rumors influence my predictions, but I also can't see Edge dropping the belt again. I don't have a clue on who's winning this one, but I'm going to go with my gut and say Jeff Hardy simply because I want him to win. As I said last month, he's the most popular guy in the company and he deserves the run he never got after winning the title in December.

Don't forget to leave your predictions in the comments below and make sure to check back here at Kick-Out!! Wrestling Sunday night for my full review of Extreme Rules! And speaking of extreme, the Top 10 Extreme Matches in Wrestling History will be posted tomorrow, so don't miss out!

5 comments:

  1. Since most of my picks are predictable, I'll go balls out with the ECW title pick. I think Swagger should get the showering of heel heat he would get from ruining Tommy's final moment and win the ECW title. If this is really Tommy's final night, put a heel over to get real hate, plus Swagger's paid whatever penance he's dealt with in the past.

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  2. Yeah, costing Dreamer his career would be mega heat for Swagger... almost a waste to NOT have him win when you look at it like that.

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  3. I am going to run these through Fire Pro Wrestling Returns (aside from the Hog Slop match because I don't think it is worth hours of my time to create her and the Strap/Ladder matches will be another kind of hardcore match). I'll get back to you with my results.

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  4. Cena over Big Show (which given the Big Show's history in my instance of FPR is phenomenonal... it was a leg submission too).

    Jericho beat Mysterio with a pin after he escaped from the Walls of Jericho (there was also a missed Lionsault which gave Mysterio a lot of room for offence and he got two near fall after that moment).

    Edge outlasted Hardy in a match with 16 near falls, some great momentum shifts and a missed swanton bomb. Awesome, pure awesome (though granted, it wasn't the ladder match, so I have to be content with a more normal match type).

    I had Punk/Umaga fight a landmine match... with a decent time limit... the first party to get up was considered the winner... Punk made the count,

    Surprisingly, William Regal ended up winning the US Championship (and to put that in perspective, MVP was the dude that took the equivalent of the Heavyweight title off of Big Show after he had defended it 7 times against the likes of Triple H (twice), Undertaker, C.M Punk, Kamala, Sting and a couple of other superstars I can't remember).

    Orton escaped the cage (and he made Batista bleed).

    Swagger pinned Christian, though Dreamer was on the mat too, so it could have been either party getting pinned.

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  5. Awesome MC! I hope you'll do that for all the PPVs.

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